Posts Tagged beauty

Hernie’s Skin Care Philosophy!!!!!

Folks are any of you skin care junkies?  Well I am.  However, I have overcome this addiction and whittled down my skin care regime to a great extent.  I used to buy all sorts of shit with lunatic claims!  I especially love the ones which claim to make you look ten, twenty, and  thirty to fifty years younger!  Will  these potions make an unborn child cease to exist I often wondered?  These claims are always amazing and usually costs you an arm and a leg!    Try reading the ‘ingredients’ on some of the labels folks!  They are deliberately designed to flummox you!  Why there are enough chemicals in some of these product to start your own chemical plant.

Chemical peel plant. Moose crotch Montana.

“I sell skin products which will make you look younger automatically!”  “My skin cream can make you look 20 years younger”!  “What, you are only nineteen years old?”  “Well you’ll regress to a fetus”! 

Hi! I feel twenty years younger after using this cream! Oh shit! I won’t be able to go on that date Saturday night, I’ll have to be reborn!

Well I am here to give you an alternative to all this chemical shit which in the long run ruins your skin!  My motto is;  ‘If you can’t eat it don’t put it on your skin.  What do I use now?  Unrefined Shea butter; African Black Soap;Soaps from soap crafts persons made the old fashioned way with natural ingredients and ‘cured;’jojoba oil oil(a misnomer as it is actually a wax);vegetable oils such as olive oil, soy oil, hazelnut oil, there are literally dozens of oils which can be mixed and matched, each having properties suited to the skin and hair.    My personal favourite is the jojoba oil.  Castile soap is also great for cleaning or using on your body.  If you’ve got pimples, jojoba oil is an excellent moisturizer to use(not that I have them).  Try it, experiment with it.  If nothing else it will put hair on your chest, better than growing a second head!

After using that chemical shitzoid cream, I grew another head. Two heads ain’t better than one. Cthulhu, you’ve got nothing on me!


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