Crackerisms 101!

Crackerisms 101!   There are several blogs I go to infested with crackers!  That’s right!  The oxygen thieves go out of their way to deflect, insult, and derail topics!  Their ‘white is right’ philosophy has forced me to invent a philosophy in regards to these fools!  It is called’Crackerology’, named after the ol’ crackers of yore!  Here are some of their modes of thought which I’ve culled from these blogs.

"My name is Joe Billy Bob and I am an Asshole!

1.  First and foremost in crackerology, is the White is right memo!    One goofy poster typed:  1. “Racism” is merely a form of generic human tribalism viewed at a particular focal distance. There’s nothing inherently unique about it.  Nothing unique about it eh?  Tell that to the millions assaulted mentally, physically and culturally over the centuries, but hey;’That happened to me as well’!  when in doubt, use this deflection, it works wonders as it may catch most off guard.  When this particular jackanapes was asked if he was racist, he gave another assholish reply:  As I don’t go around saying that one group is inherently superior to another group, the answer to your question is “no”.  In others words, “Yes I am a racist but will obfuscate and prevaricate so as to not give you an honest answer.  This can work wonders and is one of the most popular uses within this philosophy.  The more people you can piss off the better!  Keep em angry and confused!

2.  Overt race-based discrimination has decreased dramatically in the west over the past five decades. The gap between the economic and social outcomes of different racial groups has not narrowed accordingly.   Another load of bullocks!  Another favourite crackerism!  If it ain’t overt, than it only stands to reason that is covert fool.  The opening statement is a shining example of this.  What it really means is this; Stop whingeing niggers!  It’s not as bad as it was _(insert how many years ago).  Instead of overt, they have become covert, as racism is inherent to their psyche, some less than others with many talking in ‘code’.    They are so smart, some don’t even realize what day it is!  They ‘outsmart’ themselves!  They use phrases such as “I don’t see colour” or “Everyone is the same”!  Everyone is the same until the black person covets or aspires to something they want such as job or promotion, then you got or will get the job because you are black!  Their true ‘colours’ come to the fore!

3. ” I’m pumping, married to, or have black relatives, not necessarily in that order’!  That’s another crackerism they love to throw around.  They think that because they have deigned to confer ‘nature’s blessing’ on these   Negroes,  that the Negro should be grateful,and grateful many of these Negroes are!  That’s like a person who disdains others of the opposite gender.  They may dislike them but they will still hump them and in some instances breed with them!  Do I think all are like this! No I don’t, but I become suspicious when whites throw that into an encounter when accused of racism.  For the dunce, that usually is enough to shut them up.  I know better.

4.  Fetishizing the ‘exotic’ seems to be another crackerism.  I aint even going to go there.  I fetishize handbags, Frye boots, clothes, the list is endless.  However a common feature is that these are ‘objects’ not living, sentient beings, such as people who fetishize sentient beings.    I don’t go around fetishizing a group of men based on their ‘racial’ backgrounds!  It’s the pay cheque dummy!  I’ve had many a jerk off make remarks about always wanting to get with a ‘black chick’ in some out-of-the-way place so no one will know!  They don’t want to see you out in public as they are ‘frightened’ as to what their friends and family will think.   Men are pigs by nature but subtlety is called for here!

5.  Asking crackerish questions such as how did you get your hair like that?  I wear my hair in its’ natural state.  Over the years I have worn it short, braids,or  intermediate in length.  Now I have locks.  One fool asked me how long it took me to do my hair!  I told him I get up at three in the morning and do it every day!  He believed me!  You get queries like this constantly.  This can apply to every aspects of your appearance or perceived behaviour I just used this as an example.  Are they doing it to learn something?  Who gives a shit?  What you are is what you are, that is all they need to know!  They don’t have to know squat.  They ain’t really interested, they just want to remind you that you are ‘different’.  This is their polite way of doing so.  There are other aspects in life where these questions constantly crop up, the one I give is but a simplistic example.  There are millions more!

6.  Black men rape at a disproportionate rate within the population.  Their target?  White women!  This is usually put forward by white men!  I have a suspicions about men obsessed with a group of mens’ sexuality!  Come out of the closet!  The truth of the matter is, is that you don’t give a shit about rape victims whatever their colour.  What you are afraid of is the black man poaching your white women.  Don’t worry!  There is enough white women to go around, and get around many of these white broads do!  I find this bizarre to say the least and laughable on one level but scary on others.  These white racist men are obsessed with black men.

7.  Systemic Racism; the crackerism to end all crackerisms!  Systemic barriers are constantly being put up to stifle a black person’s aspirations.  This permeates all the ‘institutions’ in society, from the educational,  penal systems to the government.  This is how crackerism manifests itself in society as a whole.    A black person has to be over and above what is the norm in order to get these jobs in the first place.  either that, they pick some kerchief headed clown who will either do their bidding or ‘prove’ blacks can’t do that particular job.  Yet they are still accused of getting the job ‘because they are black’.  In school they will try to stifle your intellect through ‘streaming’.  This is a generational thing that is still going on.  These turds seem to have it for black boys in particular.  If you show above-average intelligence as a small child, that is when they start.  Many succumb to these ‘ministrations’ and subsequently, this will manifest itself in so-called ‘stereotypical behaviour’,  Being shat on from birth doesn’t count.  Everything is your fault, there is no culpability involved.  The fact of the matter is, is that they have dumbed you down so much, you may not even know why you do the things you do!   Those that succeed do so in spite of the system.

8.  Blacks infested with crackeritis!  Good ol kerchief heads.  They take white is right to the nth degree.  Watch out!  They will fuck you up either blatantly or out of cluelessness.  I don’t know which one is more dangerous; the blatant ones or the deluded clueless one!  In any case don’t engage them.  There are also the ones who suffer from this moderately.  Before you give yourself a pat on the back though, we all suffer from it whatever the degree.  The trick is to realize this rather than try to explain it away or rationalize it.  It’s like being a chronic drunkard, you will always be in recovery!

Crackerology is a wide-ranging philosophy as you can see. To quote that most greatest and most illustrative cracker ever:

“Be Yourself” is about the worst advice you can give to people.”

It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either of them.

Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.

The rule is perfect: in all matters of opinion our adversaries are insane.

Good Day to You!

Mark Twain

  1. #1 by Matari on December 5, 2011 - 22:53

    I left a comment regarding this post on Abagond’s site but it’s caught in moderation. I think you’re funny, brilliant, informative and should try to write more often. Interesting the similarities between this post and the one I wrote today, courtesy of the knuckle-head lady troll on the other site!

    I’m almost a little surprised that she hasn’t yet shown up here – lol – to lend her not so unique perspectives to your blog!

    P.S All men are pigs???
    May-haps… But some of us don’t wear our piggy-ness on our sleeves

  2. #2 by sam on December 6, 2011 - 16:45

    First of all, do not degrade pigs. Please. They are innocent.

    Second, has anyone checked out why those biscuits are called crakers? Cream crakers?? I mean, WTF? I’m a white man from the whitest north and I don’t get that fuckin cream craker thing!! Like, isn’t a craker biscuit white enough? Do we have to add cream into the name too??

    And on more serious note, this was just friggin funny. I think this is the best blog I have come across ever.

    I think I go to sauna and do little snow swimming after this one. Thank you indeed.

  3. #3 by Herneith on December 6, 2011 - 19:47

    May-haps… But some of us don’t wear our piggy-ness on our sleeves

    Too bad! In for a penny, in for a pound as it were!

  4. #4 by Herneith on December 6, 2011 - 19:50

    If that clown ‘Lara’ or any other jackass shows up here they will get ‘what for’ and how! I don’t have a moderation policy for language when it comes to these fools! Wee this post:

    I have an extensive vocabulary when it comes to cussin!

  5. #5 by Matari on December 7, 2011 - 19:26

    Since the word RACIST has now been diluted down to mean: anyone can be RACIST — AND “white” people are NOW terribly offended and hurt whenever this word is directed at them, regardless of it’s aptness — AND everyone seems to be following this new politically mandated correct speech, perhaps I’ll revert back to some other lucid phrases.

    Like : “You’re STUPID BIGOT!,” or “You’re an ANAL APERTURE!” or “You predictable prejudiced PIG” or “You MINDLESS excuse for a human-being!,” or an old favorite from the earlier Saturday Night Live TV show, “Jane, you IGNORANT SLUT!!!”

    On second thought ..
    Nah! I don’t think so. Telling some white person that they’re a piece of crap just doesn’t have the same feel (or flavor) as telling them what they’re loath to hear.. that they’re a racist!
    So, I’m gonna keep calling certain white folks RACIST, because that’s exactly what they are, regardless of what the dumb-down masses or whomever mandates public (politically correct) opinion, states.

    Oh.. I am hoping against hope that a certain someone DOES show up here.
    – for educational purposes, of course! : )

  6. #6 by Herneith on December 7, 2011 - 20:56

    Carry on son! You know things are bad when being called a ‘racist’ is on par with being called a nigger or some other word for white folks. The truth hurts I guess.

  7. #7 by sam on December 8, 2011 - 02:38

    In todays world, when even calling some one a nazi, does not even create emotional response anymore, I think you guys are on the right track. Racist is today the most potent insult for a white person, specially if that person is a “good person”, like so many white americansa love to call themselves.

    Just recently I met a white american who was a “good person” and “loved her country” and “supported the goverment” and of course, “loves Obama”. I told her she was a dumb fuck and and an idiot which did not insult her at all, but when I told her that she was a racist (she did not understand what was wrong in hating middle eastern people, muslims and arabs in general and to kill 350 000 irakis for “freedom”) she was truly insulted.

  8. #8 by Matari on December 8, 2011 - 18:26

    I hear you Sam! I’ve met and known some wonderfully nice white people who didn’t (consciously) hate me, and would give me the shirt off their back … But they were racist. They were good people, yet they harbored thoughts, ideas, opinions, beliefs about people of color that were clearly racist. I guess they could be called benevolently CLUELESS.. as in ULTRA clueless!

    This is what makes separation/segregation (whites keeping non-whites out of their spaces and places) harmful to everyone involved. The development of Sundown towns and red-lining communities/neighborhoods/districts that brought about ALL WHITE areas has hurt American race relations in immeasurable ways.

  9. #9 by Herneith on December 8, 2011 - 22:02

    @Matari and sam:

    I had a white woman start in with the water works because another worker called her a racist! Whilst trying not to laugh, I instead tried to appear serious. She asked me if I thought she was racist. I told her I didn’t know her enough to make that call. Well the dingaling started to sob at this point. I had an ‘allegation’ meeting today and the interviewer asked the person I was representing if the person making the allegation was also racialized. I asked this person why he was asking this as racialized people were not all the same. This interviewer became defensive and said they never said they were. He then changed tact. I am always wary of fucktards who always attempt to turn racialized folk into one monolithic group. They think that if you aren’t white that you all stick together like shit to a shovel, you are all the same. Anywho I think my next post will be on a lighter note about men being pigs! What fun!

  10. #10 by truthbetold on May 15, 2012 - 21:02

    This is brilliant writing!
    And so true. How come you don’t write more often?

  11. #11 by Herneith on May 15, 2012 - 21:31

    Too busy right now.

  12. #12 by diaryofanegress on May 16, 2012 - 16:13

    I left you an email….
    I recommended your blog to a few friends.

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