Men are Pigs! (But I Love them Anyway)

From just plain funky to rank!

 

 

 

Yes men are pigs!  Here are some of the things that I find particularly piggish!

1.  Funky feet!  Yes men who are hygienically challenged!  There is nothing worse than a man taking off his shoes and almost flooring you with the sulfuric stench emanating off his feet.  Try dating such a man!  I went out with a man like this once and was almost floored as we were about to get the groove on.  Needless to say, I sent him on his way!  That was after he called 911 to revive me!

 

2.  Men who suffer from chronic halitosis!  Didn’t these fools ever hear of toothpaste and mouthwash? Truly vomit inducing!

3.  Men who have a mortal fear of soap and water!  This is self-explanatory or it should be!:

4.  Men who refuse to buy murses(man purses);

5.  Sacks of shit in cheap outfits:

 

 

6.  Hairy arsed men:

 

7.  Men who refuse to put the toilet seat down. I almost broke my left buttock whilst taking a piss in the middle of the night!

 

8.  Men who sport grotesque mustaches and refuse to wash them!

 

9.  Men who do-not wipe their arse-holes after taking a shit  or wash their hands after shaking hands with the devil!

10. Drunkards!  Again self explanatory!

The assholes farewell gesture!

11. The worst, cheap bastards.  I dated a man once whose idea of a ‘romantic’ evening was going to the local soup kitchen.  Before ‘dinner’ we took a turn around the local park and sat on a bench.  He then proceeded to pull out a bottle of AquaVelva and a can of apple juice.  He referred to this concoction as an aperitif.  After getting liquored up somewhat, he became amourous and wanted to hold hands!  He had the damned nerve to ask for a doggy bag at the soup kitchen!  He then panhandled for at least two hours in order to raise bus fare to get home.  He couldn’t raise enough for me so I had to walk home.  Needless to say that was our first and last date!

My failed date and his 'concoction'!

 

Well men are pigs and the lists of their piggery is endless but I love them anyway.  For you men who take offense, consider these words from the greatest cracker every to grace the earth:

What would men be without women? Scarce, sir…mighty scarce.

Markus Twainus.  Good day to you all!

 

 

 

  1. #1 by Matari on December 9, 2011 - 11:04

    LOL

    Have you considered that if YOU were to perhaps settle down and choose just ONE GOOD man, there would be probably one less piggish man walking around fouling/stinking things up??

    Having lived long enough to observe things — occasionally the right female (significant other) has an astonishing way of removing the “pig factor” from SOME (clearly not all) men.

    Sometimes non metro-sexual men need a little help. After all, the Creator MADE you females FOR A PURPOSE that extends beyond working & shopping for fashionable footwear and accessorized name brand knockoff handbags. She knew exactly what she was doing when She removed that rib and formed y’all.

    I rest my case!
    : ))

  2. #2 by sam on December 9, 2011 - 11:40

    The thing is this: women always think that men are thinking. That is the big mistake. Just believe me: we are able to watch F1 race, that is: 2 hours straight cars going around on a single track. We can watch soccer match, really watch it. And we do not think anything while watching those. We just watch. We can actually watch anything without thinking. Actually we can be without thinking easily.

    We can also do things completely without thinking. That is why men jump from bridges and tall buildings draped on a small cloth called parachute. We can also get into a fight with a guy twice as big and strong as we are, drive too fast, run like hell, lift weights, go to wars and that sort of thing, without even thinking about them!

    We just do not think that often. That is always confusing for women. They think we think when we don’t.

  3. #3 by Herneith on December 9, 2011 - 20:42

    Dear, I’ve never been under that illusion!

  4. #4 by Herneith on December 9, 2011 - 20:44

    Oh I forgot, belching, farting and scratching their nuts indiscriminately! Not all men are pigs, just some!

  5. #5 by Matari on December 10, 2011 - 09:58

    “Dear, I’ve never been under that illusion!”

    Which illusion ..?

    Choosing ONE good man?
    a GOOD man?
    the CREATOR?
    the RIB thingy?
    SHE KNEW exactly …?
    Name brand knockoffs?
    me RESTING my case?
    None of the above?
    All of the above?
    Something else ..?

  6. #6 by Herneith on December 10, 2011 - 14:50

    That men can think or do for that matter! Conversely, many of the same things can be said about women(except the nut scratching)! This is illustrative of people’s ignorance when stereotyping people. Absurdities abound to the extent that people believe many of them. Men just happen to be the target here! This was a hastily put together post.

  7. #7 by Matari on December 10, 2011 - 17:28

    I’m looking forward to how you’re gonna spin your post on “female led relationships” !!!
    LOL

    Do the men stay home and care for the house and children while the ladies go off to work in order to pay ALL the bills???

  8. #8 by sam on December 11, 2011 - 15:35

    perhaps hastily but very acurrately except I dont scarcth my balls. other than that I think it was pretty much on the target

  9. #9 by sepultura13 on January 12, 2012 - 19:31

    LMFAO!!! This is the best post I’ve read today – the pictures say it all! 😀
    That hairy arse of shame is…I can’t find the words! It just doesn’t seem real! I can’t stop laughing…

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